day 24: {guest post} lyndsay.

it's been fun having my friends post every monday during this series (recap: sonnie, jamie, jess). and i'm so honored for this week's guest post -- by my hilarious friend lyndsay... you're definitely gonna wanna read more of her writings over on her blog.

lyndsay gives us some insight into life as a bridesmaid...

4 Important Things to Remember as a Bridesmaid

Before we get started, this list is best read to the tune of your standard wedding ceremony and reception songs. Don’t fight me on this one. I will win.

Now aside from the negative mantra “always a bridesmaid, never a bride” and the recent hilarity/catastrophe which is Kristin Wiig in Bridesmaids, I’m convinced that being a bridesmaid is a wonderful and beautiful thing. An honor as a friend, a way to bless a couple that you care deeply for, and the chance to stand up and promise to support two people in their commitment to God and each other.

If done right, that is.

So to ensure that your experience as a ‘maid is more blessed than bridezilla, I’ve concocted a handy little quick-fire list of 4 things to keep in mind as a matrimony maid. Enjoy!

1. It is Not About You (Processional: Canon in D)
Yes, your opinion is valued by the bride (doy, that’s why she is having you in her wedding and, come to think of it, in her life,) but temper your taste and keep HER and her future husband in mind when you provide feedback. If she want’s Fuschia? She shall have Fuschia. If she wants you to do an African tribal dance at the reception (this is a true story for me, btw) you shall shake it. Heck, if she wants you to wear a little top hat because there is some symbolic meaning behind it, you shall tip your hat, grin, and bear it. Unless she needs some loving truth to get her back on course if she’s going off the “I Do” deep end, you just support her and trust that when it’s your turn she’ll do the same.

2. You Don’t Have to Give Away All of Your Future Wedding Ideas (Recessional: Ode to Joy)
It’s completely okay if you have a dream first song, or a creative craft that you’ve always wanted to incorporate someday into your big day that you don’t share with your soon-to-be-wedded friend. It does not make you a bad person and it does not doom your future wedding planning to keep a few of your cards close to your chest...at least I hope.

3. Listen Listen Listen. And Then Keep Listening. (Father Daughter dance: Butterfly Kisses)
In my experience as a ‘maid, I’ve learned that a lot of times, the bride just wants to throw out ideas. Her sweet little head is dancing with favors and garnishes and chocolate fountains and flower girl headbands and she just needs to let some of it out. The same rule that applies in a business brainstorm applies in a bridal brainstorm: there’s no such thing as a bad idea. A lot of times instead of jumping to the solution, the best way to be there for her is to just let her hammer it out a bit out loud. It’s a rule for life anyway so we better get used to it, right?

4. Have Fun (Dance floor: C’mon N Ride it)
Don’t you hate when articles and blogs end with the really obvious bullet point? Me too. But seriously. Whether you’re making cake balls (ahem :) ) or tying thousands of twine around light fixtures, or setting up (and tearing down) for the shower, reception or engagement party (or all 3!), remember that this is exciting and so very special and monumental in your friend’s life. So be patient (“Why yes I’d love to look over the menu again!), make some jokes (I make my sister refer to me as “your honor” when we talk about my maid of honor duties) and have fun (discuss ways you are going to haze her in the speech/slideshow/dance floor.) Your job is to ease the stress, be supportive, and remind her that this is going to be the best celebration of her life!

Cue: Love Shack // Shout // and the Macerena.

*marisa's marks: lyndsay is dead on. enjoy this honor of standing by your friends on their big day!